Friday, July 10, 2009

Which Superhero would be best in bed?



Faster than a speeding bullet! More powerful than a locomotive! It's a bird, it's a plane, no it's Superplay! Yes? Yes? No. Perennially clean cut and, lets face it, just plain cut, the pin-up boy for good old fashioned farmyard values may fool the unsuspecting gal into thinking that just because the Man of Steel could get up and stay up aaall night he should be No.1 on the list. The brand new positions and places now available to you by bedding a man with the gift of flight now put aside, can you imagine what would happen should total and unbridled passion overcome someone who leaves accidental fingerprints in concrete and steel? And what about Superman's super sperm – his fellas wouldn't imitate a tiny pink fountain so much as a deadly spray of red-hot bullets. Ouchies

The Hulk


Pro: You're never going to meet a bigger muscle man. Con: Said muscles only emerge in a blind state of rage. Pro: You'd have heaps of hot, post-fight sex. Con: By this stage he's back to being a personality-free-zone scientist. Con: He's massively ugly. Con: He's completely green... completely. Con: He is the hulk.



Okey dokey, the deal with The Bat is he doesn't actually possess any superhuman abilities; his parents were killed in front of him (and obvious mommy and daddy issues aside), he vowed to spend his life avenging crime. Dressed like a giant bat. He's obsessed with his own dark side, making crazy gadgets in a big creepy cave and sporting latex most nights. Oh, and he has a “partner”, Robin, who also likes donning a colorful cape and tights, despite being a normal human being like the rest of us. And he's also pretty damn close to a distinguished old gentleman named Alfred. So if you're into moody bad boys who are kinda gay, don't delay. Bed The Bat today!



If you can get past the fact that it looks like he ejaculates from his hands, we're liking the way the boy in red is shaping up. 1. Again,no position is off limit. 2.No place is too far out. Ever wanted to make sweet superhero love above Paris, tangled recklessly on the Eiffel Tower?C'mon, who hasn't? 3. His alter ego is one of those adorable nerdy types. Okay Spidey, we're sold! Trap us in your web... and leave the mask on.



The passion! The raw animal lust! The scratch marks! Wolverine is a definite winner if you dig doing it doggie-style and like your X-rated adventures to skip the slow burn and go straight to boil. He's dark and broody, but very, very funny once the one-liners start coming out. The other, um, upside is of course his remarkable regenerative powers, so this is one guy who won't stay down for long.

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